Thursday, 7 March 2019

Happy Women's Day 😊

From being a protected little delicate flower...
To blossoming into realizing one's own power.

It indeed is a wonderful journey filled with joys...
Whilst also learning to tackle life's varied ploys.

Juggling different roles with ease in both sunshine and rain...
Staying calm & composed in all disdain.

Empowering fellow lassies, setting examples of valour & courage...
Flocking together and soaring high at all age.

Celebrating the most Celebrated Being...that has the ability to mother & nurture...
& Bring about loads of love, laughter, & fervor.

              Celebrating being a Woman 😇

                    Happy Women's Day💐


Saturday, 3 February 2018

This Day....That Year....

I literally went 😲 on logging in and finding the number of drafts that are waiting to be finished.  But then, it's so so very me.  A Gemini that I am, I go round and round, hopping from one activity to other, every single of which I love - enjoying each of it at that given point of time.  So that way, my list of hobbies & to-do things is just endless, and my mind might be in a totally different space every time you bump into me!  Hehe..

While I have been away, life definitely has changed yet again, taking me through different phases and altering and moulding me into a much better version of myself.  As I say that, there is an urge to write about a lot of other things; but I am trying hard to stick to the reason that brought me here this moment.

Sipping a cup of spiced tea, I got on to my set-weekly routine of checking Facebook on a Saturday evening for any messages.  And though I remembered this fact, there was a cute little picture that came up on the networking site as a 'memory' that made me smile.


It was this day 5 years ago that I took off from my Indian home ground to land on the foreign turf of  United Kingdom.  Just like they show in the movies, just like it happens with every Indian who flies abroad for the first time, my entire family was there at the airport to see me off.   Haha...sounds amusing isn't it, but there definitely were a dozen more families at the airport that day sending their young ones off.  And that is when these two precious little gems of my life, my dearest brother and sweetest little sister, who were trying to keep any emotional drama at bay, clicked this picture.  

All through the drill of finding a match for me, my mum had ensured to shoo away any proposals from prospective grooms living abroad.  Not that there was anything wrong with them, but the sheer fact that packing bags from one city to the other, travelling across India with my banker dad, had made her miss out on so many things in life that she just didn't want her daughter to go through the same.   She had missed attending most of her cousin's weddings, she could not be there for my grandfather's funeral, she missed out spending sweet but precious little moments with her loved ones for a major part of her life.  But as the saying goes - Man Proposes, God Disposes.  HE had different plans for me.

So, there I was, travelling with my brand new husband of 2 months who had been packed off on a deputation to Bristol from the aerospace company that he worked for.  As we rode the bus from London Heathrow to Bristol, the landscape alongside the motorway took my breath away.  Cattle grazing on calm, serene, endless green pastures.  Surprisingly bright blue skies on a wintery day with traces of white smokey tracks left behind by airplanes that had just flown across.  It reminded me of the then very recent game on Facebook called 'Farmville' and all the Enid Blyton books that I had devoured as a child.  Just as I was soaking in the beauty, a silly thought ran across my mind....Was Bristol a village too???  I always wanted to be able to get a first hand experience of things and locations, and so I had never read or inquired about the place.  And now, all I was wondering was if I would be able to adjust??  Would I find friends?  Would I miss my family?  And then I realized how far I had come away from them all.

But then my worries were short-lived as a little friend was already waiting for me right opposite the little studio flat that my husband had rented for us before we flew in.  A 4-month-old cute little bundle of joy, Haasya, along with her wonderful parents - who have now become an extended family of ours, welcomed us into the land that she was born into.  The feeling of having someone there, especially from the place that we belonged to, was such an instant comforting factor.

We soon embarked on our first shopping trip to the nearest supermarket, Tesco Extra, to buy a duvet as we realized there was just a mattress and nothing else.  It was 8 p.m. and freezing cold, & my husband had suggested sleeping with our warm winter coats on, but I was quite sure we would be frozen by morning.

That was the real beginning of my "married" phase with me enjoying every bit of the homemaker's role that I had happily donned.  

It amazes me as to how every single moment is flashing across my mind as though it was just yesterday.  Finding an Indian grocery store, buying the first box of mangoes, celebrating festivals in our own little way, feeling proud at the first flight of A350 - the project that hubby was called in to manage, the hot air balloon ride, the little studio apartment that actually became the most beautiful home providing beautiful memories, making merry like kids with my new found girlie gang, unexpected travel back to India for a bit only to return unexpectedly again, getting back to work, every bit of it has been so amazing. 

Five years have definitely been a roller-coaster ride with more of downs than ups, or probably it would be better to say that we have just been on a down-slide and the ups are just around the corner.

What has significantly changed though is the fact that - that day, I walked in with a man - my husband- who was just a little over a stranger to me.   And today, after having lived through the good and bad moments together, after having faced and survived situations, that stranger has become the core essence of my life.

And over these 5 years, the 'village' that I wondered if I would adjust to - the City of Bristol, apart from being so warm and beautiful in itself, has enriched us with so many fulfilling and learning experiences that it has now become our second home.  😁


Wednesday, 7 December 2016

Adieu, The Victorious "Lalitha"




Having chosen to revisit an old interview rather than watching her being laid to rest, I was once again mesmerized by the confidence she exuded, and the command over language that Madame J had.  A symbol of women empowerment, straightforward, strong, and bold, this gutsy lady will definitely have her name etched in the book of the history of Indian politics. 

Always surrounded by controversies, hated and targeted, this woman managed to rule, and how!!  Wouldn't it be just right to focus on the positive aspects of a personality rather than pinpoint the negatives, especially when the positives have actually succeeded in bringing some sunshine into the dark dungeons of the society?

The late Chief Minister worked her way into the hearts of her subjects with projects ranging from the Cradle Baby scheme for protection of female infants to master health checks.  From making food affordable to the economically weaker sections at the government funded canteens to providing seeds to farmers and encouraging farming in urban environment, she became a Brand.  From rain water harvesting to sea water desalination, offering many freebies or subsidies to the poor and needy, tackling the fallout of LTTE, introducing India's first women police battalion, she proved she was one of India's most powerful administrators, and in the process, became the messiah of the masses.

Just watching her speak showed how strong the lady was in her mind, how clear she was in her thoughts, how dignified and composed she was in her person, and how high she held herself despite being in the mud-slinging profession of politics.

Why I opted not to watch the live funeral ceremony was because of all the hypocrisy that comes along with it.  People who would have wished for her life to end (or at least her political career for that matter) could now be seen shedding false tears and speaking volumes of rehearsed lines as the all-decked-up hearse carrying the remains of the woman leader made its way to its final destination.

There probably are millions out there watching her interviews, reading, and learning so much more about the lady than they ever knew while she was still alive; thus joyfully appreciating such a dynamic politico and at the same moment being engulfed in an unknown cloud of sorrow on realizing that the soul has departed.  And suddenly all the wailing and crying happening back there in the Southern state of India makes so much sense.

All of this just brings me to one point.  Why is it that at any given time, any "opposition" (just not political but at individualistic personal levels too) always has to oppose the "ruling?"  Irrespective of the correctness of the decisions taken, there is always an opposition to it just because it is someone else's decision; whereas, all that should matter is how the decision will do good, benefit largely, and bring about a bigger better change in scenario.

As long as there is a thirst to just rule, to just have the power, and not to serve, many humble souls trying to build brighter prospects for their fellowmen whilst building their own empire shall continue to be maligned.

But then, those souls shall strive towards achieving their goals till the end and then be missed, mourned, and always remembered by the humongous wave of humanity, primarily composing of the common man - who benefited out of the leader's life. 

Just like today.  Just the way the Makkal of Tamil Nadu are mourning the loss of their beloved Amma.


I Salute Thee.  RIP, Ms. J. Jayalalitha.





Thursday, 17 March 2016

Guardians of the Night



Hiyaa!!!!


Do you find yourself lost in a web of thoughts, spinning words at the least expected hour??  Happens, ain't it?  

Always the case with me...and more so when I am on the potty seat...Ohhh, why that frown now?  As if you never use one!!!  And come on....it's a universal fact yaaaa...only you don't wanna accept that you get most of your brilliant ideas in the toilet too ..Duh!! :P  

This random thought though knocked at a random but decent hour as I lay wide awake in the middle of a moonless night, staring out of my window and listening to nothing but sweet silence. 

Read on and let me know if you find my random thoughts good, very good, or superlatively awesome ;) :P :P 


         Sky so dark, streets so misty...
         There ain't any stars scattered itsy bitsy..


         Silence and darkness together compete...
        As they wait for the Sun to greet..


      He shall rise and bring some shine..
     While they rest until it's time to dine...


        Back they come, hand in hand...
         Guarding the night, together they stand.



P.S.   Well, this is called Leisure Writing ;)  :D  


Wednesday, 16 March 2016

Rangon Ki Holi


With festivals a galore in India, each unique and holding it's own significance, Holi is definitely one of the most loved ones.  And why not??  It is a festival celebrating love.  They say Lord Krishna's pranks of coloring his beloved Radha's face gradually turned into a celebration with people smearing their loved ones with colors and expressing their love.  It also marks the onset of Spring.  Even today, the temple towns of Vrindavan and Mathura host the grandest celebrations with people coming in from all over the world to experience unfettered joy.  Having heard and read so much about it, I wish I could be a part of all that energy, love, and joy someday.

Memories of my childhood engulf me as the festival approaches.  Pestering Maa to buy me some colors in the market and then again wanting to buy all of them while she would ask me to choose any two or three.  Such a difficult choice to make, that would be.  Come on, who can leave out any color for that matter??  I wanted all of them.  Year after year, we would battle it out...I won some, and She won many.



Image Courtesy:  Google - India Mart


I still remember my rendezvous with the festival of colors.

I could hardly sleep that night.  Raghav had told me umpteen stories about it, and I was just a few hours away from knowing what it would be like.  I had my imaginations running wild.  I was anxious and excited at the same time.  I was wide awake, or I thought so, as I heard my mum's voice, "Vidyuuu....Raghav is already here....Don't you want to go play Holi??!!"  Goodness Gracious!!!  When on earth did I fall asleep!!  I hurried out of the bed, scrambling, falling, managing to freshen up (or did I??  :P), ran to the bag filled with colors and pani ke gubbare, picked them all up, smiled gleefully at Raghav, and ran we both out of the house screaming, "Holi Haiiiii !!!!"

Scared of all the mess that I would get my hair into, Mum had made me sit down the previous evening and oiled my hair nicely using her all-time favorite brand of coconut oil - Parachute.  She loved the fragrance and vouched for it's efficiency.  "It will protect your hair from all the dirt, enhance it's growth, and give it a beautiful shine," she always has said.

Raghav was my landlady's grandson and my best friend who taught me how to cycle, how to burst crackers, how to fly a kite, and now he was going to take me to experience and play Holi !!!  Being born and raised in South India, I had no clue as to what Holi was even at the age of 8.  So this was going to be a big adventure for me and having heard so much about it from my buddy bro, I was all set to have fun.

The moment we landed on the street, I heard a splash and before I could realize what had happened, I was all drenched in reddish colored water.  My heart stopped for a moment...looked up at the kids around me in a state of semi-shock even as they smiled, giggled, and laughed...and then came the adrenaline rush...having tasted the flavor of  Holi!!!  Chasing each other with pichkaris (plastic hand-held water pumps), throwing water balloons, smearing colors, splashing water...Oh I had so forgotten myself and ran around the streets of Karol Bagh with Raghav and his friends.  My heart thumps faster, and I feel a strong rush of emotions as I recollect my first Holi.  How I have been in love with the festival of colors ever since then.

The love affair continued when we moved to Pune.  What beautiful memories!!!   CanPark was an apartment with 40 flats, and it was mandatory for everyone to participate in the holi celebrations (else they had to pay a price for it...*wicked grin*).  Holika Dahan (a ritual signifying the victory of good over evil) with offerings of Puran Poli (a sweet bread made of self-raising flour, split Pigeon Dal, and jaggery), singing and dancing around the bonfire was just the beginning of all the fun.

Next morning, all the didis and bhaiyyas and some super-enthusiastic uncles and aunties, including my parents, would happily go around the apartments, greeting and smearing everyone with loads of vibrant colors and pulling them all out for a gala celebration.  I do remember a particular someone getting seriously offended, but then, we did get away with bura na mano, Holi Hai !!!!  Haha... 

Scrumptious food would be arranged in the parking area.  Oh!!!  How we hogged on the Samosas (a deep-fried savory with a filling boiled and smashed potatoes, peas, and Indian spices) and Jalebis (a deep fried sweet made of self-raising flour and gram flour, dipped in sugar....mmmm...yummm...am drooling at the thought of it) in our tiny-mini breaks!!! 


Age, sex, and religion never mattered.   Everyone was out there, enjoying themselves to the core, running behind someone with a bucket full of water or trying to escape getting dunked into the mini water tank...haha (of course with all safety measures taken).  :P :D  

There you go....memorable moments of our mommies and daddies having a gala time during one of the Holi celebrations at CanPark, Pune.







And mind you, apart from those two kids who probably got into the frame by chance, none of us juniors were even aware that someone was taking pictures.  We all were in our own colorful world.  But then when the photo albums made rounds, we had made such a hullabaloo as to why we were not informed....even we wanted to get clicked!!!  Huh!!!







By noon, after having all the insecurities and inequalities wiped out, CanPark would be a bunch of super-happy faces soaked in rainbow colors; having forgiven and forgotten, laughing and hugging each other.

Such is the power of this festival that works it's charm playfully, renews bonds and strengthens the faith in relationships, families, and friends.

There are times when the joy experienced is so overwhelming that it cannot be put down in words, and that's exactly what I am feeling right now.  Pune gave me my happiest and most memorable Holi moments.

Time caught up.  High school, and then college, and then work gave no time for any more celebrations, and the most common reason was "Oh Come On, we are all grown up now!!"

But then my marriage took me to UK, and there I saw that just like the 8-year-old me, my 20-something-year-old friends had never celebrated Holi !!!   Yes, you got it right.  They all were South Indians.....Tamil-speaking South Indians.  I leaped at the chance, and thankfully, my girls grinned happily at the idea of playing with colors.  Oh How eagerly we had waited for the colors to be delivered after having ordered them online.  Those packets of colors turned out to be precious packets of love and joy that we experienced as we played like kids even as the Brit neighbors watched in amusement. :) :)  





Now with the festival just around the corner, and my mind having taken a trip down the memory lane, my heart flutters at the idea of splashing colors at people - known and unknown, irrespective of color, caste, creed, sex, or age just like this ad by Parachute Advance.

I’m pledging to #KhulKeKheloHoli this year by sharing my Holi memories atBlogAdda in association with Parachute Advansed. 

I hope to unleash the kid in me this Holi.  Will you???


Chalo Phir se Bachpan Laut Chalte Hai...Chalo Phir se  Khul Ke Khelte Hai...
Aakhir Tyohaar Bhi toh Holi Haiiiiiiiiiiiiiii !!!!






Tuesday, 8 March 2016

Share.... & Show that You Care



It was a weekend, and my 8-year-old nephew, Nikhil, happened to join me on my grocery & veggie-shopping errand (yes, this particular shopping is definitely an errand for me).  While we were at it, the phone rang, and there came the chirpy-voice of my other little nephew, Karthik, aged 6, "Hello Kaaki!! Where are you, and how are you??"  Excited on knowing that it was his cousin, Nikhil grabbed the phone, and the two got into a conversation.

Nikhil:       Hey Karthik!!  Why didn't you come to granny's house today?  I was waiting for you.
Karthik:     What to do, I was very busy you know.
Nikhil (bantering):    Oh ho!!  What is it that kept you so busy?  You know I cycled and played all day today.
Karthik:      I swept the floor and helped mom mop it too.  
Nikhil (laughing hysterically):   What !!!  Are you a girl to sweep and mop the floor?  Hahahaaa
Karthik:      So what if I am a boy?  Should I not help mom?  You should also do it.  
(I was amazed at the little one's understanding and stern instruction to his older cousin).
Nikhil (again laughingly):    Why should I do it?  Yashu akka will do all of that.

Yashu is my 16-year-old niece and the oldest of the kids at home.  And yes, that makes her job all the more difficult, especially handling all the three younger brats when elders are busy with the chores or some serious discussions.

Admiring Karthik's thought process at such young age, and of course my co-sister's educative ways, we drove back home, and the first thing that Nikhil did was to go "Maaaaaa... Ajji....You know what...." & narrated the whole conversation between him and his little cousin.  As expected, a fight broke out between Yashu and Nikhil over the same even before he could finish laughing at his cousin's "foolishness."  The women of the house (my mother-in-law and sister-in-law) who were watching the on-goings in amusement were quick to reprimand Yashu and lectured her as to how girls or women should take care of all the household chores, and that men were made for other things.  Well, I had to console myself that they didn't say - BETTER things.

Such a common sight in almost every Indian household!!!  I say Indian because having lived abroad for a couple of years, I have seen how both men and women there take up equal responsibilities right from running the house to caring for the children to earning their bread and butter.  It's just wonderful to have that kinda scenario where both get ample time and space.

But here, it's been an age-old practice in our country wherein the women of the house slog round the clock.  It doesn't mean the men don't work.  It's just that most don't "work" while at home.  And this is not a feminist statement (It's a fact ;) :P ).

How many times hasn't a tired and irritated wife come out of the kitchen and yelled at her husband who is happily glued to the television while she has been going around doing her odd jobs, feeding the kids, putting them to bed, serving dinner to the rest of the family, and just wanting to go sleep??  Did you visualize your mum??  Honestly, this would be at least once-a-week thingy at our place, and am sure at many of your homes too.  Wasn't it the same years ago when the ladylove would go give a helping hand to her husband at farming, grazing the cattle, and then come back home to cook and do her duties as a daughter-in-law, wife, and mother??  A sister would do all the chores that she could, and her brother would be happily playing around?? 

No matter how much we speak of gender equality, of women standing on par with the men at work, the scenario at home hasn't changed much.  I mean, a woman might be handling the toughest of profiles at work, but at home, she still has to make her own cup of coffee and clean the toilets and do the laundry while the husband can just go hit the sack, because... Oh come on!!  Poor thing, he's tired after a day's work.  You gotta understand, Baba!!  And women!!! Women are supposed to be super heroes who need no rest.  This actually makes my dimag ki batti to light up :P.  Battery companies like Duracell don't actually need to invest much on making an ad with animations and stuff like that.  They can show a woman working round the clock instead. What say?  Any better bet for a trust-worthy and long-lasting (non-exhaustive, actually) energy bank?? 

As I say non-exhaustive, I recollect a friend's mom muttering, "Who cares about me?  Even if I am on my death bed, they shall say, 'finish that work, & then you may leave' ." 

How unfortunate is that just because someone goes around the errands dutifully, we take them for granted?  Wouldn't it be nice for a son to lend a helping hand and say, "Mom, Aaj khana main banaunga," or for a husband to help do the dishes or for a brother to arrange his wardrobe instead of expecting his sister to do it for him?  Women, like their male counterparts, would love to put their feet up and read a book, catch up with some entertainment on the television, party with friends, or just have some "me time." 

A friend who's been married for 15 years now dreams of a simple luxury of being herself and not having to race against time every single day.  She told me one day, "How much ever we struggle, we shall all, in a way, remain bonded laborers. We shall never get freedom from this terrible routine grind."

Sigh!!

It's high time we change these ancient, stereotyped gender roles of our society.  But then twisting the tag-line of a popular ad, "Why should boys have fun all the time??"  Why not share the workload with your partner or sibling and then have an amazing time together?  Oh come on, R. Balki has even made a movie on role reversal sharing responsibilities again, but in the non-stereotypical way) now, so if my blog fails to drive any sense, go watch Ki & Ka (I haven't watched it yet, but hopefully they shall work their magic on you!!! :P) :D.

As I write, I realize how truly blessed I have been to have had wonderful supportive men in my life; my dad, my brother, and my husband.  My husband, in fact, was the one who taught me cooking after marriage, haha, and it feels super awesome to wake up to a hot cup of coffee or a bread/omelette on a weekend.  Once in a while hi sahi, but it makes my day!!   

And the story at my place that day didn't end there.  I took Nikhil and Yashu to the kitchen and took out a bowl of firmly set fresh yogurt, and Nik exclaimed, "Maami !!!!  White Cake!!!"  It was my turn, and I asked him if he would like to learn how to make it, and he jumped with joy.  I winked at Yashu, and she smiled.




I am joining the Ariel #ShareTheLoad campaign at BlogAdda and blogging about the prejudice related to household chores being passed on to the next generation.  

The Whistle Blower's Song



                                                       Faces a galore, all masked...
"Who's a friend of you all," I asked.
 
"Me," "me," "me too", said they all.. Little realizing, the masks shall soon fall.
 
Lose didn't they any, but broken was I.. For they let me down from sky high.
 
Smile & praise for you is brought on... Bitch & abuse is what happens when you are gone.
 
I wonder how can you pretend... To someone you call a friend.
 
Lost trust and faith in this bond... I gotta feeling that I have been conned.
 
Whom do I trust, what shall I say... They had fun, while I had a price to pay.
 
Hurt I am, but none is bothered... As I stand alone, & they are all gathered.

Opine they do that I shall budge and fall...
But Truth I shall speak, and in Death, stand tall.

Hope you like this attempt of mine.